on the lo(o)se with kat woman and the rest of my weekend.

well, hello there.

why yes, that was me in the crowd at the King City County Annual Fairplex Fair and Livestock Auction this past weekend ! why? well, let me tell you all about it. my Weekend that Lasted One Million Years began on thursday night, when i went to pick up my amiga oaxaqueña (and my sister in wrestling, who gave me my first mask) Kat Woman , from L.A.X. and ended up waiting for a good two hours while customs tried to convince her that she was someone else who, unfortunately, has been living in the united states illegally for some time and, therefore, should really be carted off to the pokey. luckily she speaks english well, has had plenty of experience dealing with customs before, and has the patience of a saint. all this aside, she LOOKS WHITE, and it was this that turned out to be one of the more important factors in them letting us go, as a racisty comment from one of the customs folks revealed. we made it out with some vaguely threatening advice to keep in mind for "next time". i dunno.

afterwards we ate some empanadas con flor de calabaza at one of the precious few oaxacan restaurants in L.A. - Monte Alban in West Los Angeles - and headed home so that we could get up nice and early and begin the long journey up to hayward, california the next morning for her first show with the wrestling outfit All Pro Wrestling.



the show went well, despite her losing to the ever-intimidating Cheerleader Melissa, who is this week's New Favorite Person. i am thinking Kat was just thrown off by the fella in the wife-beater who repeatedly stood up to shout "huh, you're not Halle Berry !" i suppose lucha libre fans can be just as embarrassing, but at least they have those pretty trills to fancy up their lackluster insults.

saturday, we drove two hours down to King City for the next match, which was at the fair. i hadn't really done my research, and was surprised to find that it was at an honest to god, big-deal fair with hay and livestock and an amateur talent competition....and a rodeo, and creepy carnies, and an auction, and seals playing with water hoses. Kat hadn't seen anything like this before, so we spent much of our pre-show time just wandering around and laughing. i met the cutest baby goat in the world, and also saw a tumor grilling away at one of the barbecue stands.







this is Nikki the New York Knockout...she is all smiles now, but she wasn't after she saw me posing with her boyfriend, the most dreamiest, crystal-clear blue-eyed wrestler in the world, Nathan Rulez.



Nikki took it out on poor Kat during their match - after Kat's tope went terribly wrong and she crashed to the ground, giving herself a concussion, Nikki jumped up and down on her for a bit, blaming a fan for "pushing (her)" and they were eventually, after an eternity, both counted out. while Kat writhed around on the floor of the locker room, trying to catch her breath and recover her equilibrium, Nikki's five other boyfriends all ran to her and offered her water, silk dressing robes, and velvet cushions. Nathan and I were nowhere to be found at this time.

we drove home right after the show, exhausted and dazed, in order to get a few hours sleep before i drove her back to L.A.X...and then i had just enough time to rush down to the Ramada Inn for the very last night of The Pretty Okay Ho-Hum Spectacular on Ice. i was very distraught with sadnesses. so much so, that the only photo i remembered to take was of Josh Fadem with peach all over his face.*



well, hell - i can't decide if i want to use capitalization or not...i don't really like it aesthetically, but i don't want to look like a moron either...for similar reasons, i chickened out on using "ourselfs" again, even though i think it is cute and funny. what do you guys think?

xo,
b

*wow. this photo has gotten an extraordinarily high number of hits. i am reminded of an oft-used expression from Isle of Man resident and frostpinni consumer Michael Daedalus Kenny - please know, dear readers, that in describing this photo i was not employing a "euphemism".